Hi Everyone. Living in the adult world, I see many of us, (myself included), dealing with a lot of stressors. However, over time we have developed more and more resilience to the stressors in our lives, because we have gotten stronger emotionally every time we’ve gone through the grieving process, grieving over whatever it was we’ve had to endure. And, each time we experience getting through a challenge, we experience growth, and the ability to spring back from the next stressor that comes our way.
But, what about the kids? They aren’t adults yet. They haven’t had as many experiences to get through, and therefore haven’t developed as much resiliency. Sometimes I think people forget that kids aren’t just maturing physically, they are maturing personally, emotionally, socially, intellectually and ethically as well. We need to look past ourselves, and help our children get through what life is throwing their way. I think we would all agree that school is much more demanding than it was when we were growing up. Here are some ideas to help your child deal with the stress of school, peer pressure from friends, pressure from the media, and yes, pressure from family as well:
*Listen to them. Let’s let kids vent about what they are going through. Acknowledge that they do have a lot on their plates. We all appreciate any empathy that is thrown our way.
*Offer suggestions for how to manage time better. Teach them how to make a list and prioritize.
*Teach your child how to relax. Give him opportunities to take breaks from studies and other responsibilities. Kids perform better when they are allowed play time. Check out this article: http://www.parenting.com/article/why-kids-really-need-recess
*Provide a good study space, one that is free from distractions, but yet is near you, so you can be aware of just what it is your student is learning about.
*As a veteran teacher of 40 years, I know how often students run out of paper, writing utensils, glue, etc. Make sure your child has all of the study essentials, and put an extra supply in the study area discussed above, along with a stapler, hole punch, etc.
*Experiment with playing calming music when your child is doing math, or something artistic.
*Do something enjoyable with your child everyday. No time? Why not read a good book together just before bed. Walk the dog together. Make dinner together. Time can be found when it is a priority.
*Compliment your child when he or she is doing something nice, or trying very hard to succeed. Help them feel good about themselves and remind them that they are loved unconditionally.
*Help your child find a passion to enjoy. It’s never too late to start karate lessons, pick up a musical instrument, take an art class, or join a team. Give the opportunity and then listen to what it is they would like to explore. It might not be your first choice, but it might be something they would really like to try. If money is a problem, see if a grandparent is willing to foot the bill, or perhaps there are scholarship opportunities available.
I’m sure there’s more to suggest, to help our youth find more joy in their lives. Please feel free to share your thoughts. Kids are only young and innocent for such a short time.
Mary
